I’m mildly surprised that we didn’t wind up with the sheriff at our house tonight. There was so much screaming. It started with an innocent little bath. And an innocent little poo. And a toddler who’s got enough knowledge of where and when to poo that she was quite traumatized about poo-ing in the tub.
Then the toddler started screaming for the potty. And once on the potty started screaming for a diaper. And when she was told she needed to take a shower to get cleaned off (as the tub was in need of a good cleaning now) she started screaming about that. The actual shower experience? That was quite, quite traumatic and caused a great deal of screaming. At this point Denis and I were trying not to pee our pants laughing. There’s something about a naked toddler covered in slippery soap who is clinging for dear life to a parent and refuses to put her feet on the floor of the shower long enough to get rinsed off while alternately screaming for a diaper and screaming for her bath that triggers an automatic laughter response. Because it’s either laugh or go insane.
We finally got her rinsed off and in a diaper and she started screaming for the potty again. At some point during this whole scream-fest, we realized the front door was open, and it’s a really quiet night. The neighbors must think we were torturing her or something. I suppose from her perspective we were.
And it’s, what, 11 already? And she’s still up. Not screaming, but not sleeping. I don’t know if she’s still getting over the traumas of the evening, or if this would have happened anyway. (She had pink lemonade at dinner. Mmmm, sugar.)
If she ever takes a bath, sits on the potty or willingly takes a shower any time before college it will be a miracle.