One Year Ago

One year ago today, I found out I was pregnant. Actually, I had taken a test the night before, and saw a faint line, but then I looked at the expiration date on the box and realized that it had expired more than a year before, so I didn’t think I should believe the results. Being the total geek that I am, when I went to buy new tests and saw these digital ones, I had to get them. This was the easy test – after I took this one I had to have blood drawn every 48 hours for the next week and a half to check my hormone levels.

Not a lot of people know this, but it took us three years and infertility treatments to get pregnant. In fact, this was the last “easy” cycle – instead of just taking drugs, I was going to have to start giving myself injections if this one didn’t work. We fell into the “unexplained” infertility category. Nothing particularly wrong with either of us, but things just weren’t working anyway.

It was a really hard couple of years. Every time I heard someone else’s wonderful news, I was happy for them, but I cried for what I was starting to believe I’d never have. I can’t believe I can say this after all those tears, but I’m actually glad things worked out the way they did. If everything had gone as planned and I had gotten pregnant in those first few months, we would not have ended up with this particular child, and she is the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to us. She is worth everything we went through to get her. She is our miracle.

We do want to have another child someday, if we can, but if it’s not meant to be that’s ok too. I made sure to cherish every minute of being pregnant – even the uncomfortable ones – just in case it never happens for me again.