This is how my morning has gone so far:
12:03 AM – Go to bed, realizing that reading a suspenseful book before bed when home alone is a bad idea.
1:22 AM – Must. Fall. Asleep. Soon.
5:42 AM – Wake to baby crying and making her “parched” noise that means she’s thirsty. Too tired to walk downstairs to get water. Offer to nurse instead.
5:57 AM – Encourage baby to go back to sleep despite obvious light outside and loud birds chirping. Damn birds. Baby insists, “Per! Per!”. Change diaper.
5:59 AM – Drop back into bed.
6:30 AM – Alarm goes off. Hit snooze.
6:37 AM – Alarm goes off. Hit snooze.
6:44 AM – Alarm goes off. Realize that dogs need to be taken out and fed soon. Hit snooze.
6:51 AM – Alarm goes off. Fine. Fine, whatever, I don’t need sleep, I’ll just make coffee.
7:10 AM – Showered, dressed, etc. Go downstairs.
7:25 AM – Dogs are fed, outed, etc. Start unloading dishwasher.
7:26 AM – Break two glasses all over counter, floor, and inside of dishwasher. Shit.
7:35 AM – All visible pieces of glass picked up off floor and out of dishwasher, counters wiped down. Don’t know what else to do about dishwasher. Thinking I should use the wet Swiffer to make sure there are no tiny pieces left on floor.
7:36 AM – Aaaargh! Dog pee all over tile in front of closet Swiffer is in. Shouldn’t have hit the snooze button that last time.
7:37 AM – Out of paper towels to clean dog pee. More in basement. God, I need coffee.
7:38 AM – As long as I’m down here, better move the laundry from last night before I forget and it gets all mildewy in the washer.
7:44 AM – Tile cleaned. Kitchen floor Swiffered. What on earth do I do about the dishwasher?
7:45 AM – Contemplate options: vacuum out dishwasher? Re-run dishwasher? Take out all dishes and rewash by hand?
7:46 AM – Decide to ignore remainder of dishes in dishwasher until it’s a decent hour to call mom and ask what to do. Start coffee.
7:48 AM – Blog.
It can only get better, right? Is the coffee ready yet?