Carolyn

Dear Carolyn,

Today you are three years old! You didn’t quite believe us at first, because you thought you needed to have a party before you could turn three, but I think we managed to convince you by the time Daddy left for work. (You’re still waiting, patiently, for your ladybug cake, though!)

In honor of your birthday, you told your first joke. Your great-grandparents called to sing you Happy Birthday. When your grandpa asked you about it at dinner, he said, “I just want to know one thing, were they on key, or were they flat?” And you replied, “No, they were on the phone!” At least, I think you were trying to be funny.

As I predicted last month, things are much more routine and much less stressful. You’re still having trouble with the transition to preschool, but I’m encouraged by the fact that your teachers think you’re adjusting just fine. Maybe we’ll just be spending the next 15 years with you telling me you don’t want to go to school every day?

Mimi has become quite the alter ego for you. You use her all the time to save face now. I’ll ask you if you want something, like pancakes for breakfast, and you’ll immediately say “No!” But then after a couple of beats you’ll say, “But Mimi thinks I should…” Now Mimi’s Mommy and Daddy apparently live with us too, and if there’s something you think I don’t want you to do, you’ll tell me that Mimi’s Mommy told you not to do it. Hey, whatever encourages you to eat the occasional meal and keeps you from climbing on the back of the couch works for me.

It takes my breath away to see how much you’ve grown since the day I met you. There are days that feel like years all on their own, but when I look back at the years it feels like it’s been just a few days. It’s so cliché, whenever anyone says how quickly it goes by, but it’s so very true. You’re three now, and you’ve learned how to open the refrigerator door, get dressed and undressed, and use the potty pretty much independently, and I’m worried it won’t be much longer before you don’t really need me for much of anything. But, I promise, I will always be here when you do need me. Happy Birthday, baby!

Love, Mommy

Dear Carolyn,

Today you are one month away from being three. Soon I’m going to have to convince you that the answer to how old you are is “three!” instead of “two-and-a-half!” (I never could get you to say “two-and-three-quarters”.) You are already excited about your upcoming birthday, and the answer to any question about it is “a ladybug cake!” Someone could ask you “when’s your birthday”, and you answer “a ladybug cake!” “How old will you be?” “A ladybug cake!” It’s actually pretty funny, especially with complete strangers who have no idea what you’re saying and think you can’t talk clearly. Not that the confusion is cleared up much when I translate for them.

I’m finding that I’m still translating for you, even though I don’t really think I need to anymore. I guess I’m just most fluent in Carrie-speak. Complete and clear sentences – maybe because they’re unexpected? – still seem to confuse people. And you do still have a few made-up words. I’m dreading the parent-teacher conference where they ask why I feed you “opium” for breakfast. I’m absolutely, 100% certain that you can say the word “oatmeal”, you just won’t. Why can’t you just say “pasketti” like a normal child?

Speaking of teachers, it’s only been a couple of weeks but you seem to be enjoying preschool. Well, once you’re in the room and I’m out of sight, that is. Parting is such sweet sorrow, or something like that. But when I pick you up you’re all full of happy stories about what you did all morning, so I guess it’s just a matter of you getting comfortable with me leaving and then always coming back for you.

I realized today how close you are to reading – you know several words by sight, including “mom”, “dad”, “dog”, “cat”, “stop”, “go”, and “Carolyn”, and can sound out many words…as long as they have short vowel sounds, anyway. I’m not sure where to go from here. You honestly can’t get enough of letters and words, but I have no idea how to teach you the rest of what you need to know to actually be able to read. Phonics are a great start, but how to I explain that sometimes “y” sounds like “ee”, or that “oo” in “moon” is different than “oo” in book?!?

We’re settling into something resembling a routine now, which I think (I hope) will help some of the stress we’ve both been feeling over all of these transitions. I think that by this time next month we’ll still feel busy but we’ll be comfortable with it. Which is good…I have a ladybug cake to make!

Love, Mommy

Dear Carolyn,

So much has changed in our lives this month, I don’t even know where to begin. You’ve gone from having a full-time stay-at-home-mom to having a small-business-owner mom. Instead of spending our mornings making pancakes in our pajamas, you now eat dry cereal in the car on our way to an all-day playdate at a friends’ house. OK, it’s not quite that bad, but it is stressful on both of us, and all I can say is…I think it will get better.

Despite the stresses of the past few weeks, you’re doing new things every day and being as cute as you can possibly be. The other day you actually started sounding out words! I wrote out several three letter words and you sounded each letter out and tried to squish the letter sounds into their words – you got about half of them right. But the neat thing is that you realize that those letters you love so much make words!

And it’s really, truly official: you are potty trained! You still wear diapers at night and for your very rare occasional nap, but during the day you wear your beloved Dora panties (you’ll deign to wear Blue’s Clues or Elmo if none of the Dora ones are clean.) It’s pretty funny – you’ve maybe watched Dora three times in your whole entire life, but since Dora is on the diapers you used to wear you just had to have Dora panties. And when I asked you what kind of birthday cake you wanted? Dora. (I’m drawing the line on that one. Shortly thereafter you decided you wanted a ladybug cake anyway.)

Your imagination is starting to run away with you. You can take an empty bin (well, first you empty it by dumping all the toys on the floor) and make it into a boat, a car, a house or a rocket – that one involves taking your doll-sized pack & play and putting it on top, because of course the rocket needs to have a top. Mimi is constantly playing with you, but sometimes she’s a baby, sometimes she’s your age, and other times she’s a dog. For that matter, sometimes you’re a dog, and you will only do what I ask you to do if I say, “Puppy dog, could you please _____?”

To celebrate my day off, you turning thirty-four months old, and your upcoming first day of school, we spent today at the outlet mall. Your favorite part? Driving the car with Elmo and Zoe that was outside the Carter’s store. My favorite part? Spending the day with my little girl. I may be a part-time working mom now, but I think that’s made me appreciate the time I am home with you even more.

Love, Mommy